Archive for the ‘HIDEOUS’ Category

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Viva Las Vegas Weddings! Awful Ozzy Wedding video!

March 30, 2009

This website, Viva Las Vegas Weddings, has a treasure trove of horrible themed weddings you can choose for your big day. This is video of one such wedding.

Many thanks to for Katie for submitting this video link. (Note you have to have Real Player installed to view it) I thought her write up was really funny so I’m posting it too!

” HOLY CRAP! I knew this sort of stuff went on in Las Vegas, I just had NO IDEA. This place, Viva Las Vegas Weddings does regular weddings but most importantly, they do themed weddings. They also do a video of the wedding and archive the weddings on their website. While clicking through hoping to find a funny one, I stumbled upon the  R. Strayer Wedding. Holy sh*t. The saddest Ozzy Osbourne impersonator marrying what might be the most awkward couple ever. Also note the woman’s lack of enthusiasm – I can already see the resentment in her eyes for making her participate in such a wedding.
Also note – at the end of the ceremony, “Ozzy” is supposed to sing a song to them but their CD player keeps skipping. MAGIC.”

Here’s my own little play by play of the wedding if you are unable to view the video:

Ceremony starts at around :50, and the “Ozzy”  appears at 1:32 and procedes to sing the ENTIRE song while the fog machine gets going. About 3:22 Ozzy begins his speech in his HORRIBLE English accent… they confirm their vows with a “hell yah” instead of I do…

5:30 begins ANOTHER song with them just standing  hugging while the impersonator shuffles his feet and sips his water in front of them.  7:30 Ozzy bumbles even more vows before the ring exchange. 9:00 begins my favorite quote of the ceremony : “Do you promise to love each other with in true rock-n-roll,  pour some sugar from time to time and always ride the crazy train of love and never treat each other like a couple of war-pigs, right. Ny  the powers vested in me,  by all of rock-n-roll, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Congratulations, we got a new married couple in Las Vegas!”

Start NEW awkward singalong song.  Ceremony pauses at around 12:20 for them to sign their marriage license, then at 14:25 they come back in and awkwardly stand around, then they have to come stand at the stage while they try to put a song on, then they give up  and pose for pictures.  Wow.

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Groom attire FAIL! Italian Olympic Boxer Clemente Russo wins worst wedding attire in history!

March 30, 2009

Ooooof. This is SO bad. Italian athlete  Clemente Russo won a Silver Medal at the 2008 Olympics for Boxing, but he won’t be taking away any honors for this atrocious pimp-esque getup that he wore to his wedding to Laura Maddaloni.  Fur?? Top hat? Silk shirt? Gold CANE???!!!! Noooooooo!

Hansel?

BARF the wedding dress is terrible too!

Many thanks to Silvana for this!

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Ugly Bridesmaid Dresses

February 27, 2009

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These dresses could use a little extra support…

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Santa bridesmaids, oh dear!

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Some of these pictures were taken from ThreeTimesaBridesmaid and Etiquette Hell, both great sites!!

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Hello Kitty Weddings part II

January 22, 2009

TW reader Julie sent me a link to the blog Hello Kitty Hell, one man’s chronicle of what it is like being married to a Hello Kitty fanatic. It is SO funny, he has an amazing cache of Hello Kitty awfulness, which includes the oh-so-practical Hello Kitty AK-47 and the Hello Kitty is my Jesus tattoo.

I had a Hello Kitty weddings post a little while ago, and I was so happy to find the videos that accompany two weddings that I featured, along with even more Hello Kitty wedding crap. Shudder.

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Camouflage Weddings

January 19, 2009

Look out! There’s a raccoon behind you!

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This one is kind of pretty, by Erkia Sarkozi

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This is a wedding invitation, in case you were wondering:

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http://www.bridalpeople.com

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Um, your wedding cake is staring at me.

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Hey, wedding or prom, there’s still no excuse!

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Yikes

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Does there really need to be a severed deer foot cake knife holder?

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Denim Wedding Dresses, Cutoff Shorts at Ceremony, and a Denim Cake. Sweet.

January 15, 2009

Cutoff Tobias shorts and bowties?   Oh, snap!!  Work it!

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And this gift set has everything you need for your denim-friendly wedding:

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Sorry, it doesn’t come  with the parasol:

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OOOH OOOH and your dog can match…. YES!

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Jean Cake!

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S&M Wedding

January 15, 2009

This is from a blog written by Tampa Bay Times columnist Leigh Armstrong. His blog is SO interesting so I highly recommend checking it out. He had the privilege of attending a very unique wedding:

“It started out with a bang when April, the bride, was brought in over the shoulder of one of the groomsmen and placed down in front of the altar by her husband-to-be, Mark. All the while the maid of honor was holding a leash attached to her neck. From there, the first half of the ceremony ran fairly normal but when the vows were given and rings were exchanged, the wedding took a turn to the kinkier side.

April immediately turned around and kneeled as her maid of honor removed her collar and leash. Mark then proceeded to gently bind her with rope. Once she was completely bound and teary-eyed – which I hope was just because she was emotional and not because the ropes were too tight – Mark placed a permanent collar around her neck symbolizing her as his property. From then on, the wedding was just a traditional affair and if it wasn’t for the dresses made of latex and leather vests, it would’ve looked like it was a normal reception.

Honestly, despite the variety of fetish models in attendance and the fact that the officiator of the wedding was holding a horse-hair whip, the wedding was about the two of them being in love. For them it just happens to be a more painful sort of love.”

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Super Ugly Wedding, complete with “Santa” Wedding Dress!

January 14, 2009

This wedding has it all. Santa Claus wedding dress with flowing train, check. Giant his and hers cocktails, check. Multiple hideous cakes, triple check!

The bride, looking thrilled:

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I wonder how many people stepped on this thing:7

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Drink up!!!

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Is it just me or does the red cake have eyes on it? Kind of reminds me of the Hamburglar:

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Is that a shrimp castle?

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And for the grande finale, the orbiting creature cake!!  GAH!

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Balloon weddings! Ick!

December 25, 2008

I’m not a total balloon hater, I usually love them, but I LOATHE them at weddings. It just seems too cheesy, too birthday party. Here are my favorite balloon-related wedding pics, enjoy! If you’re a balloon lover, perhaps these will be inspirational!

Lets start with cakes!!

Uhm, am I seeing what I think I’m seeing here?? 

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Attire:

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These balloon dresses were not in a wedding, but hey, they’re awesome. You can find more at Aeradeco.com, along with pictures of some truly awe-inspiring balloon creations. You won’t believe it! 

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The mannequin will be included in your rental:

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You can incorporate bride and groom balloon figures in your reception, don’t forget that winning detail!

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These are made by Magical Balloon-Dude Dale, check his website out for more…

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Doesn’t it look like toilet paper hanging from the ceiling? 

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Hello Kitty Weddings, VOMIT!

December 2, 2008

Eek!

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Having stuffed animals walk you down the aisle is just not okay.

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Here’s the dress photoshopped on a bride, for the full effect:

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