Ouch. Ouch. Ouch.
And the bride wore white – long, curly white strands of wool.
Louise Fairburn, who is an award-winning sheep breeder, decided to get married in a fleece from her own flock.
She designed the gown and took wool from her favourite rare Lincoln Longwool, Olivia
And she extended the theme to the rest of her big day, putting her groom Ian, 42, in a waistcoat made from wool.
Mrs Fairburn even carried a Bo Peep-style crook and the ring bearer’s cushion was made from a fleece.
Guests were given chocolate sheep-shaped favours and even dined on lamb dishes by celebrity chef Rachel Green.
But it was the dress that was the highlight of the wedding in Market Rasen, Lincolnshire, near their farm in Risby.
‘It always occurred to me what a waste it was to turn this beautiful long wool into carpets,’ the 38-year-old bride said.
‘But I saw an advert with dresses made out of carpets and it twigged that I could have a dress made of wool.
‘I suppose I am sheep-crackers, but the idea just came to me and I designed the dress myself with a little bit of help.’
The dress, which cost £1,500, took a spinner and dressmaker 67 hours to make. But it was worth it, as her husband said he was ‘blown away’ when she walked down the aisle.
‘I took one look at her, my lip curled like a young sheep’s does and I started blubbering,’ he said.
Mrs Fairburn added: ‘I wanted this dress to look like any other wedding dress and for people not to realise it was wool until they got close and that’s what we achieved.
‘I just wanted to prove that you could do something fantastic out of the yarn and ended up with something that was beyond my wildest dream.
‘I want to prove to people that wool is not just something for knitting bobble hats from, and that our native breeds can have just as big a presence today as in the past.’
It was love at first sight for the couple, who met when Mrs Fairburn was looking for someone to install a farm track at her home. After searching in the Yellow Pages, she came across Mr Fairburn’s firm.
He said: ‘I opened the Land Rover door when I arrived and said that’s the girl I’m going to marry.’
Now the couple are successful sheep breeders, and won top honours at last year’s Lincolnshire show.
The pictures of this wedding come from the blog of the bride’s best friend, who writes: “If you’re looking for wedding logos stamped all over everything like Chinese water torture thumped into your head over and over, you’ve come to the right place.”
The bride spent months making nine of these boutonnieres herself, which is impressive:
Sketch of the cake:
Wine glasses with 24k gold logos:
My favorite caption from the blog: ” And without further ado, here’s a picture of me and Bridezilla herself. The reason she’s smiling in this picture is because I told her that she will be crapping turds on her wedding night – with the logo on them.”
If you’re not already familiar with internet celebrity Randy Constan, or “Peter Pan” as he likes to be called, get familiar. Randy’s website rose to quasi-fame several years ago largely due to the extensive library of photos he has posted of him posing in various costumes. A friend of mine sent me the link to his website about five years ago, and I have to say, its not the costumes that I found unnerving, it was the Anton Chigurr/Dorothy Hamill hairdo. I mean, the guy is in his fifties!! I all but forgot about him until TW reader Kathleen sent me the link to his wedding. He was looking for his “Tinkerbell” even then (that was the purpose for the website in the first place, to find a girlfriend) , and I’m glad he finally found someone. To each his own…
TW reader Kat sent me this YouTube video of her sweetie proposing, under the subject “Awesome Yet Tacky Proposal.” I’m not trying to spoil the surprise, but the proposal begins :28 into the video…it’s not a trick.